help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
