2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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