I must be too annoying 4 u.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize