i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
