So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
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