I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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