help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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