u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
