Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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