Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
