Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
