Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I want to make a zoo with you.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
