i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
jump out the window naked night went bad
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