Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
