Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
