Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
