There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
