PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
He shit in the fireplace
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
