you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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