you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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