doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Randomize
