also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize