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• (818): View more from California

  Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.

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• (818): View more from California

  Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night

  (334): View more from Alabama

  I felt like a fucking code breaker.

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• (347): View more from New York

  you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.

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  Some Animals Are Total Jerks (10+ pics)

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.

  (1-614): View more from Ohio

  and what did he say?

  (614): View more from Ohio

  there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war

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• (210): View more from Texas

  remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues

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• (360): View more from Washington

  You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.

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  23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week

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• (739): View more from

  IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING

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• (806): View more from Texas

  Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Shut up Max.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"

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