i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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