Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
