Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize