Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
