can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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