how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
There r osticjed everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
do nipples grow back?
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