Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize
