Got a toothbrush?
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Ladies don't puke and tell
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
Randomize
