Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
