I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
My vagina is officially offended.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
