He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize