i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
