if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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