why didn't you poke me back
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
