I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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