if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
