Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
