i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
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