Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Randomize
