And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Randomize
