Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
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It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
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I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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