is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Randomize
