I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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