the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize