did you get engaged???
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize