everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
Randomize
