they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
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